Joy Delayed

Buffy/Xander

FRT

Spoilers: For the comics, but nothing specific.

Summary: Xander has no joy until he least expects it.

Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be mine, no infringement, no profit, just for fun.

Distribution: my LJ, my site, buffyxander, any where else, just ask.

Feedback: is better than chocolate. (Yes please!)

Author’s Notes: from Antennapedia’s prompt ‘Four times Xander asked Buffy out and got no joy and one time he didn’t ask (but had joy). Unbetaed so all mistakes are mine.

Xander would never forget the first time he asked Buffy out. It was that first year, on the bench by the stairs. After all the practicing with Willow he just went with his heart and said what came to him regardless of how pathetic it might make him sound. She shot him down. Something about not wanting to ruin the friendship they had.

He’d sat there, his smile fading. It still hurt, years later, though the pain had dimmed to a dull ache that manifested only when he thought about it. He’d gone home at the end of the day and practically worn out his records. Thankfully he’d since invested in CDs, saving the vinyl for the really bad days.

The second time really didn’t count (but he still did) because Buffy had been sick. She’d had that flu-thing and he put himself on Angelus lookout duty. That’s when he’d done it. He reasoned that if Buffy was unconscious or out of it, she couldn’t say no. And if she woke up he could always say he was checking on her.

He’d snuck into her room, making sure she was sleeping. Creeping up to her bedside, Xander couldn’t believe that she still looked good, even while sick. But then he’d thought she was hot when she was a vampire, so what did that say about him? He took her hand in his, breathing deeply before going on.

“Buffy, will you go out with me?”

He held his breath, as if expecting an answer. Buffy just tossed a little in her sleep and Xander relaxed. He leaned over and kissed her forehead before letting go of her hand and leaving the room. There was an evil vampire on the loose and he had a job to do.

The third time will never be spoken of again. By any of the Scoobies. There was tequila and “Truth or Dare” involved and that’s all Xander will tell anyone who asks.

The fourth time was bittersweet. It was after he’d saved the world (and Willow) but before any of the nastiness with The First. All that summer he, Buffy and Dawn had almost been like a family. He’d driven them both everywhere, Buffy would cook and Dawn would just sit there and smile at them both. One night when Dawn was at Janice’s, he and Buffy were just sitting on the couch.

“Buffy?”

“Yeah, Xand?”

“Do you want to go out?”

“Thanks, but I’ve got a ton of stuff to do. I have to make a quick sweep of all the cemetaries, check Dawn’s homework, then I have a pile of student files Robin wants me to go over. Raincheck?”

“Sure, no problem.”

He smiled but his heart broke anew. That sort of led him to saying yes to Anya which opened a whole different can of worms. Then he lost an eye and hell broke loose, literally.

The time Xander didn’t ask came unexpectedly, as did most good things in his life. They were in the castle, making sure all the min-Slayers were in bed, except for those out on patrol of course. Life had been good to all of them. They’d repaired their friendships, getting back into the swing of things. There had been a few times Xander could have sworn that Buffy was flirting with him, but he chalked it up to wishful thinking.

As they approached Buffy’s bedroom, Xander mentally prepared himself to say goodnight, go to his own room and dream of regrets. Buffy put her hand on the knob but stopped, turning to him.

“Xander?”

“Yeah, Buff?”

“There aren’t any apocalypses scheduled for tomorrow are there?”

“Uh, no. Why?”

“Well Willow agreed to take over Slayer sitting duties with Giles tomorrow and I was kinda hoping that maybe you’d want to see the new Harry Potter movie with me.”

Xander swallowed.

“Um, yeah, we can point and laugh and mock all the magic stuff.”

Buffy smiled brightly before leaning up and kissing him on the cheek.

“It’s a date. Goodnight!”

With a final grin in his direction, Buffy disappeared into her room. Xander took a moment before Snoopy dancing his way down the hall and around the corner to his room.